"They say you can't turn a bad girl good, but once a good girls gone bad, she's gone forever"
Is it bad to think that you might have a problem that you're not willing to face or accept? You're a compulsive liar, but I'm not sure you know it. You say things, and tell stories that are made up yet you believe them. You believe that they are real & the truth, but the truth is it's all in your mind. I don't get it. Why do you make yourself suffer like this? Why do you live this way? Unless you're actually happy. Maybe deep down inside all of this, everything that's happening, or that has happened is what you really wanted. Is it? If it is I'm sorry for you. I'm sorry that you don't feel the need to have us around. Go on and be without us, if that's what really makes you happy. The thought of knowing that all of this might be true haunts me.
Last nights party was a huge flash back. I remember being there 2 years ago seeing many of the same faces but also a bunch of new ones. It was good to see them but it wasn't the same. So what do I do? Drink up a bit of artificial happiness. For the hours being my enjoyment bumped up a little as moments became blurred and forgotten. Then looking at pictures from last night slowing puzzling back the events that took place. I enjoyed the party for the moment. But I can't say that it was a night that I will look back at and want to re-live again. Cheers
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
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