I used to be in love. I used to love deeply. I used to be deeply in love. And when I did love, that's all I did. This feeling, thought, expression, emotion, & action that we call "love" was once my main priority. Top of the list was loving you. But I didn't even fully realize how much I loved you until lust knocked me down. Lust tricked me, an imitation of love, looks & feels like "love" but only for the moment. Infatuation with that fresh new love feeling, but then that lust high dies out quickly once you see that you're loosing you're real love. That's when I realized I made a huge mistake that started the long phase of slowly loosing you, but also that very mistake made me see how much I love you/ how much I was IN LOVE with you. That's when loving you became priority. That's when I was blinded by love. That's when I HAD to prove how much I loved you. And as much as you might have believed me, I know that deep deep down inside you never forgave me. Even though you said you did. We went thru so much after that, and you were back to loving me as much as I was loving you. But this love was gentle, you were there for me at the right times but you kept your distance. Breaking your trust never let you get too close to me. At least emotionally. Then I lost you. I once "[loved] deeply in one direction" and I learned that you must appreciate and fully commit to the things you love or else you'll lose them. Now I'm "more loving in all" the things I found that I'm in love with.
"To love deeply in one direction makes us more loving in all others." - Anne-Sophie Swetchine
Dear Anon,
I'm actually not sure about what I want the public to see in my life. So I'm changing it up just a little bit. All of my old post are on another blog. I'll still be writing thoughts and all that good sentimental stuff, but I'm keeping a little more of my life a sweet secret.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
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